Okay, so picture this, I’m performing to 200 elementary school kids in a school gym. The chicken dance song comes on and this 4 year old, who previously was just twerking in another kid’s face, is just wayyyy to into it. Suddenly, as he’s quacking beaks with his hands he casually walks over and “HONK!HONK!” He double snaps his “beak hands” on my nipples.. I later went home and got a gym membership. Saddest true story ever.

– Kyle